How do you show up for your team?
If you work in a team, you likely have had some great and not so great leaders. As a leader, I’ve collected a list of the top actions and traits of the leaders I admire.
Here’s my list, what would you add?
✅ Develop a Clear Vision (the foundation to it all)
A successful leader sets the direction for the team and aligns the work and individual development plans to this vision. If there’s no vision and clear alignment for the group, there’s inconsistent results. If you’re inconsistent about your vision, you will undoubtedly create confusion among your team. Be clear and your team will thank you.
✅ Provide Timely, Consistent, Relevant, and Respectful Feedback
A successful leader creates a safe and honest space for which to communicate with her team. This feedback loop should be two-way and modeled with a proactive and interactive approach to asking for and receiving feedback. Some tips on giving feedback are:
Be specific about how expectations weren't met.
Recognize what went well and express what specifically fell short.
Provide examples of how the team member can bridge the gap to great performance.
Find ways to ask for feedback on your performance:
How am I doing as a leader?
In what areas can I improve?
In what areas am I doing well?
If you’re not regularly asking for this feedback, and providing it, how do you or your team members know how you’re doing?
✅ Act with Integrity
All of the leaders I admire do what they say and take accountability for their decisions and actions. Nothing can cause a bigger breakdown of trust than saying you’re going to do one thing and then doing something else, or equally as harmful is lying or making excuses. This is shady and most people can see right through it. Don’t lie. Be frank. Admit when you’re wrong. Be willing to have difficult conversations. If you’re communicating with respect, you shouldn’t worry about hurting someone’s feelings. Your job isn’t to manage other people’s feelings. Their feelings are their job to manage. Staying aligned with your integrity is going to go a long way. This goes back to the clear vision. If you aren’t aligned with the vision, are sending mixed signals by floating around directionless, you’re likely exuding energy that’s also seems to lack integrity.
Your job isn’t to manage other people’s feelings. Their feelings are their job to manage.
✅ Rock Solid Boundaries
Successful leaders know how to practice healthy boundaries because they know their vision, are aligned with that vision, and know what fits and doesn’t fit within that vision. This allows them to hold people accountable when they’re not meeting expectations. A skilled leader knows how to express how their team member’s actions or results either are or aren’t aligned to the vision in language that stays within their integrity. A sure way to lose the respect of your team is to continue bending. Practicing boundaries is something that gets easier over time. People typically bend on boundaries if they're worried about disappointing the other person. Remember, you aren't accountable for their feelings. You're accountable for the vision. Find out what activities, actions, and behaviors align with that vision and stick to them. Show your team what this means by posting this vision where everyone can see it. Better yet, create a draft of what you envision and allow your team contribute their ideas. This collaboration not only fuels the enthusiasm, but will also make your job easier.
✅ Encourage through Thick and Thin
Remember the last time your group leader gave you specific feedback to let you know how you rocked that vocal audition because of your pitch, ability to adjust your volume at just the right times, and engaged with the audience? It felt good to hear how your contributions made a difference. Or, remember that really big mistake you made and how your boss mentioned that she was really proud of how you kept your cool through the difficulty and focused on solutions? That felt good too. Here’s the thing, your team member already knew she made a mistake and likely feels terrible about it. She's already devised a plan to avoid making the mistake again. There’s no reason to pour salt in the wound. Encouraging her through the challenge is what she’s going to remember and will enable her to focus on solutions during future challenges. Establishing a culture of learning creates a safe space everyone needs in order to grow. Be a cheerleader to your team - through thick and thin.
✅ Express Vulnerability
None of us is perfect; that would make life really boring. You will go a long way when you admit that you're also learning and growing. Being seen as human will help to build respect and trust with your team. You can’t expect your teammate to grow unless you’re also growing. It's ok to express that you don't know an area of your job or role, but that it's an area where you're working on expanding. For example, many people don't like public speaking. If it's part of your job to lead a quarterly department presentation in front of two thousand employees and you're terrified, be honest and get their support. Tell your team that a presentation of this magnitude is new to you, you're nervous, and are excited to learn a new skill. Ask for their support.
✅ Ask for Input
Successful teams are encouraged to provide input and are more engaged when they feel valued. Your team member's thoughts and ideas are what makes your team strong. Everyone's ideas should be expressed. Some ideas will lead to innovation. No matter what your industry, having a diverse perspective makes the whole better than the sum of it's parts.
"When you don’t feel appreciated and valued, you are less likely to bring your best self to work, and you are less likely to flourish on your projects."
-Terina Allen, How Bad Bosses Compel Good Employees to Leave, Forbes
All of these skills work synergistically to create a healthy environment. If the foundation (aka vision) has cracks, you can’t have boundaries, set clear expectations, create a consistent and safe feedback loop, hold people accountable, and create energy and enthusiasm toward where you’re going.
How you show up for your team makes a big difference. Whether you’re leading a large corporate team, a sports team, or a theater production, these are leadership skills that your team deserves.
And, if you’re leading yourself through life, these are skills that will enhance your life as a human.
Ali Dombek Handel has been a leader for nearly 25 years in her personal life and her career. While she's not a perfect leader, she continually aspires to learn and practice new skills. Ali draws inspiration from personal mentors and world-renown leaders like Brené Brown and Simon Sinek. Some books that have been integral to her leadership and communication style are:
